Re: This is my autobiology~

Posted by Tim Luo on 2007/10/27 9:55:03

D15,

You need to take care of things like agreement and some spellings first.

The following are some rudimentary suggestions.

I am ***, grew in a family with four members.
If you want to use something after a comma, you need to use a participle, yet this construct is still somewhat strange in this instance. Maybe you can just put "I grew up in..." instead.

I still have a younger brother, who is an engineer in an LCD manufacturer.

Nevertheless, putting "still" there sounds strange too.

My family education is very severely, which especially is emphasized on ethics, morals and responsibility.

My family education was very strict, which especially is emphasized on ethics, morals and responsibility.

Therefore, I have individual characters of independence..
Better revise this part.

I had studied in High School of National Normal University, which provided a free environment for studying, and discovered my interests in life sciences, so I chose to study in a department related to life sciences in the university.

Spellings like "sincer", "knowledg" and "adition" should be taken care of first.

There are still some more like this, please change them first before we go on any further.

Others can also chip in.

Hope this helps.

Tim