Euro-English

Posted by futari on 2007/2/20 23:26:04

> Enjoy your English while you can... The European Commission has just
> announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language
of
> the European Union rather than German, which was the other
possibility.
> As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded
that
> English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted
a
> 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
>
> In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly,
this
> will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
>
> The hard "c" will be dropped in favor of "k". This should klear
up
> konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
> There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when
the
> troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words
like
> fotograf 20% shorter.
>
> In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be
> expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are
> possible.
>
> Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which
have
> always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
> Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the
> languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
>
> By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing
"th"
> with "z" and "w" with "v".
>
> During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords
> kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil
sensibl
> riten styl.
>
> Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it
ezi tu
> understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
>
> If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.