Re: LOVE begins, LOVE ends

Posted by EastCoast on 2007/5/25 1:03:57

Before making a long-term commitment with someone you need to know that you are compatible of giving your heart and your soul to the person you love. You need to make sure that you can live with their life views. The last thing you need is to invest years into a relationship, possibly even get married just to find out you have vastly different views towards educating children, or whether women should work. I'm not saying there are right and wrong views. The only wrong views would be ones you would not be able to handle. For each person this is different. These questions should be asked by you before you make any decision as to whether you and the person you love can handle some differences between each other. No matter how close you are to each other and how much you agree on there will be ups and downs for a couple, you just have to know how to deal with them.

There is so much involved when you love someone and being in love does not mean you have to give up your values or how you feel inside. Many times when a relationship is developing there will be situations come up that can cause confusion, heartache, stress, anger, or many more feelings that can cause you problems inside your heart and mind.

For Example:

A couple has been seeing each other for sometime now and they have each said they love each other and have spent all their free time just enjoying being together. Each sharing their heart with the other through love and cuddling with kissing,

Then one evening things seem to be a little different and you both have had a great time together and now you’re alone with each other and you each begin to share your heart and cuddle with each other. Then things go to far! Are you ready for this? Is this what you want right now? You have a choice if this is what your heart wants and you are absolutely sure then it is your decision and you do what your heart says, If you are not sure about the love that you feel or if your not sure about his motives and how he feels then you have a hard decision to make. Is this what you want? If it is not then you need to say it and say it so that he understands.

If he cares about your feelings and your heart and he really loves you he will understand, but if he dose not and says something to you like “ You don’t love me!’ or “ Why not?” or “What is wrong with you?” there are many things that can be said but it all comes down to what you want. Remember if you are ready you make that decision not him. When you are ready to give all of your heart then you can make that decision. Don’t be forced to do anything you are not ready for………………. When you are ready you will know.

Now I can also tell you this and it is not meant to make you nervous about your relationship or to make you think that he is only after one thing. Many men will take being turned down badly and they may get angry and even storm out saying things they may not mean. If he does this and he does not care how you feel or that you are simply not ready or even sure then maybe he does not love you as much as he said. If he loves you he will understand and will wait to that special time when you are ready.

Or maybe he was after just one thing and was not truly in love with you as he stated. Here are some questions you should ask yourself……..


Do you feel that you are ready to take that next step?

Are you able to give yourself freely to the one you love?

What are your religious views?

What are your views about an afterlife?

How should we agree to handle arguments?

If you're mad about something how will you let me know?

If you're having problems would you talk it out or keep it inside?

Do you like sharing your feelings?

What are your views about same sex friends?

How do you feel about ex-lovers being friends?

How important is a girl's or guy's night out?

Who should hold the main financial responsibility in a marriage?

Should a wife stay home with kids?

How would you feel about women who make more money than men?

What are your views towards handling money?

Do you feel you should save everything?

Do you feel you should splurge a little?

How would you rate your ability to handle money?

How would you handle a debt problem?

What would you do if your partner became disabled and couldn't work?

What would you do if your partner faces long-term unemployment?

What would you expect from that partner?

Would you have an abortion?

What are your views on abortion?

Do you want children?

How many children do you think a couple should have?

How would you discipline your children?

Do you think couples should argue in front of their kids?

Do you feel couples should have displays of affection in front of their kids?

What are your views on the educational system?

How would you want your kids taught?

Who do you expect would be the primary care giver for your children?

How would you handle your partner if they developed a problem such as gambling or alcohol?

What would you do if your partner cheated on you?

At what point would you consider divorcing a life mate?

Where do you want to be in 5 years? 10 years? 20 years?

What are your life goals?

What are your passions?

Do you believe in marriage?

Do you believe you should only marry once?

What do you hope to gain from a marriage?

What do you expect from a marriage partner?

What do you feel is the purpose of a couple getting married?